just because it's offered doesn't mean you need it :)

giving myself permission to not eat things, just because they are offered.

going to BJ's and not having a pazookie, just because that's what their special is.
just because it's offered doesn't mean I have to eat it.

going to Aubrey's and not ordering pizza, just because that's what their special is.
just because it's offered doesn't mean I have to eat it.

going to Red Lobster and not eating the biscuits, just because that's what their special is.
just because it's offered doesn't mean I have to eat it.

sometimes, depending on our surroundings, we feel obligated to do something, or be something or someone else, even though it's not who we are or what we need.

I'm comparing food things because for me, food is a downfall, and I have to so many limitations on it, I feel like if I allow myself to cheat in a controlled environment, it's ok.
but then I allow myself to do it too much, and it comes back to bite me.

lifelong struggle.

this was also a problem for me in college, especially being autistic and not knowing it.
I wanted to be part of things, be with people, but masking so I wasn't really me and I would push limits I knew I shouldn't just hoping it would help.

but it didn't.
it never did.
and it always made me feel bad.