my chronic life- self-care

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My nails get too long, they peel from the tip, the pointer fingers start to curl into my finger.. they start chipping and breaking.

Before i had kids they did the same but they were also very thin and bendy. Now at least they are "thicker".

before i treat them, the everyday nails

the nail treatment set my husband bought my for christmas 2017. my sister bought me one a few years back, too. they last me a couple years!

how they look afterward

Now I use this nail treatment kit a couple times a year to really care for them.. on top of weekly filing and using a strengthener as a base coat. Every now and then i'll let them go naked for a day, but most of the time, i protect them with color.

Sometimes it's even hard to do my nails because the tips of my fingers hurt. :( So i'll have to do it in steps. Take off my polish, and then later file them and prep them, and then sometime after that paint them.

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PT (physical therapy) home exercise programs are vital for my strength.

without them, i get weak so easily. (like not being able to clean the top of my stove, or even smaller, opening a brand new can of food or ripping off the top of my fiber packet.)

unfortunately with my lack of energy (chronic fatigue from EDS and POTS) i don't generally have the "want" to do it because it takes so much out of me, and because of my memory problems, a lot of times i'll forget to do it.

so if i don't make an effort to put it on my calendar to remind me to do it, and then make sure i fit it into my day, it goes by the wayside.. even though i can see my equipment daily.. it's very visible for the same purpose, to remind.

i put my exercises (and my oldest daughters) in a binder to help me visually.

i also have tools from my occupational therapist that help me work on my hand and wrist strength, in the form of exercises with a rubber band and different firmness' of putty (like silly putty).

i also have a foam soccer ball in my purse that i can fidget with (because of ASD) and i feel that can be helpful for my hand strength as well as my autistic tendencies and anxiety.

i'm still clumsy because my hands, wrist, everything is super floppy (hyper mobility) so i'll drop things.
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showering? ha.. well.. every few days, i'll make sure i do it because i see my hair getting greasy or if i'm having a good day, i'll do it, because i know i have the energy and it makes me feel good.

i have trouble with the heat because of POTS and the feeling of the water on my skin because of ASD, but once i'm in, i generally don't want to come out because i get comfortable.

shaving goes in spurts.. i can shave my pits in the shower, and i can trim my body hair as long as i don't have to bend over very far. shaving my legs usually happens while i'm sitting on a chair with my feet soaking in some warm water, so i'm solid on a chair and my hips don't have to bear my weight.
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getting enough sleep can be tricky.

i have insomnia and RLS (restless leg syndrome), and then if i have an injured body part that i'm favoring, it makes it harder (like right now i have a broken/bruised pinky toe). sometimes i have to resort to taking pain meds before bed to dull the sensation so i can rest. it is helpful, i just don't like taking more meds than needed. i already take two meds at bedtime for depression (doubles because it makes me drowsy) and for restless leg syndrome (nerve disorder).
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i dont wash my face every day because, again, either i forget or i'm too tired and i don't want to use my energy on it. but i try to at least moisturize more often, because i have dry spots on my skin, and especially in the winter, i get dry patch breakouts.

also because of my autism, i pick at things, so i end up picking at anything that doesn't feel right on my skin, and it ends up being a months long healing process (because of my picking problem, i'll pick it again, and my EDS skin doesn't heal very quickly), ending in a scar that i then "have to" cover with makeup or see all the time. generally they fade over time, but it's a LOOONGG time.

I have these dry patch breakouts on my ears, too, so i'll have picked, sensitive, thin and scarred (because of EDS) patches on my ears, too. *sigh.
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mental health help comes in the form of tools my psychologist introduces to me. i have a paper pad that helps me through each day, i have oils and a diffuser, i have a yoga mat to remind myself to relax, i have mindfulness exercises to help relax all the tense parts in my body, i have candles (my husband had a collection of candles he recently unloaded and gave to me to burn.. YAY!), i have a blog.. sometimes it comes in the form of just watching a movie or hiding under a blanket (i have generalized anxiety disorder and depression).

i'm picky on my oils. i'll only buy two different brands, because i want to make sure i'm putting pure plant oils in me/my household (young living and NOW essentials). i have enough stuff bombarding my body everyday, i don't need/want to put more crap in it.

learning my triggers and being aware of my surroundings, being able to prepare myself ahead for situations, letting myself feel things and work through the stress instead of ignoring it.

so many things to learn and adjust.
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i have a speech therapist who i visit weekly who helps me with my cognitive dysfunction. she has me do brain exercises to keep me sharp with math and reasoning, memory issues.

i have some word search books at home, i crochet, i have a type of word search game on my phone, as well as solitaire, and i've picked up reading again. mostly for inspiration, or certain topics, but i've challenged myself with a few books lately to try to expand my thinking and dive into unknown information, and it's been very hard, almost impossible to read these. they are very overwhelming and i can focus very well, let alone absorb the material. but i'm trying. even if i fail at these, i succeeded at completing the challenge.
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sometimes self care means going out to my garden for a bit, sometimes it means driving someplace to take a walk, sometimes it just means sitting on my front porch or swing or hammock to relax and take in the sounds and smells and clear my brain (if i can).

sometimes it means going back to bed and resting as long as my body needs my.

most days it means wearing any wrap or brace i think i need in order to function in my home. my body and my mind and my internal organs are so unstable, and sometimes won't function or cause more pain.. so self care means just being.

self care means "taking care of yourself.." no matter what that might entail.

it could mean writing down all my feelings on my blog and not publishing it, just to get my thoughts out into visible words.
it could mean blogging so i can share my inner turmoil and thoughts with other people without seeing the feelings on their faces or having them respond verbally, since most of the time, i really just want to be heard and not have people try to fix me.

it could mean sending the kids outside to play or upstairs to watch a movie or mandatory quiet time so i can have calm and silence.

sometimes it means doing something i love (like cooking or coloring or sewing) so i feel even a little bit connected to myself and a spark of joy.

*whatever it means for you.. practice self care!